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In the relationship that I have with my daughter, every day I realize that everything I say has enormous power and weight over her attitudes and behavior. When she was still very little, I did not realize the power of my words. Today I understand why every time I asked her to order her toys, she didn't. Instead of telling him what to do, I insisted on telling him "how messy you are." The one who was doing it wrong was me.
It took me a while to realize that I wasn't teaching my daughter to be orderly. On the contrary, he was putting a "label" of messy. Children are like that, they believe absolutely everything we tell them. Moreover, they "dress" as the qualifiers, good or bad, with which we title them, sometimes. Like adults, children also make mistakes and failures, but only parents who are able to control their impulses can help them overcome them.
"You're a junk", "how lazy you are", "you're scared", ... are just some of the things that some parents highlight over and over in their children, and that only encourage the opposite of what they expect of their little ones. To ensure that children are responsible, disciplined, happy and orderly, it is necessary to motivate and awaken in them a positive action in all their tasks. And not only that, the example counts a lot. It is always better to surprise children by doing and saying something nice about them than by demanding an attitude for which we have not prepared or educated them. Good words to children are better than just reproaches and quarrels.
So you have to be very careful what you say to children. A good exercise would be to reflect on the last time we have “applauded” a good attitude or good behavior from our children. Let's make a list of the good and bad things they do. The good will tell us what we are getting right, while the bad can not only indicate the weaknesses of our children, but also and above all, our mistakes and carelessness in their education. What do you think?
Vilma Medina. Director of our site
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